You know what I hate? Texting! What moron ever decided that putting a messaging source for anytime of the day on a phone was a good idea? For one thing, as a student, they cause nothing but problems. Teachers seem to think that we are "cheating" by texting other students, when, honestly, we are texting our parent. Yes that right… our parents. As sad and almost pathetic as this fact is, it's the truth. Yet, it matters not to teachers. They take our phones anyway and then our parents yell at us for getting our phones taken away. Really? You've got to be kidding me! It's a futile battle that simply ends up spinning around and around in a vicious circle.
In addition, texting gives people you have absolutely no desire to talk to the ability to start a conversation with you whenever they please. And it's not as simple as ignoring a phone call. "Oh sorry I missed your call. I was in a movie." Does this excuse work for texting? Nope! Because texting can be done silently and it is thus expected that one texts back. So then you are left with the internal debate of just stopping the conversation and risk angering the person, or keep suffering in misery. Now, if you chose the first option, you should always think of an excuse so when you next talk to said person and they ask why you didn't text them back, you have a more intelligible answer than "I- Gah- Duhhhhhh," (lights self on fire). So here is a list of excuses that are sure to work:
- The Lame Excuse: Sorry my phone died.
- The Distraction: Oh I'm sorry, I just… Hey! Is that a unicorn?!
- The Turnaround: What text? You never replied to mine. This is all your fault!
- The Phone Death: Sorry, my phone self destructed
- The Theft: A ninja came and took my phone!
- The Nerd Reference: My phone turned into a Transformer.
- The Discovery: I found the door to Narnia. Turns out there isn't cell service there.
- The Never Fail: Chuck Norris threatened me and said if I didn't give him my phone, he would kill me with his pinky finger.
Now, if you have managed to still love your phone's text messaging capabilities at this point, I'm hoping this last point will ruin it for you. If not… get off this blog and go do something more meaningful with your life. Like texting! OMG! How exciting! So this leads me straight into my next point. Text lingo. OMG! 4COL! TIGAS? LOL! See how dumb I just sounded? Well that's how dumb about 90% of teenagers sound these days. I mean, what did I even just say> Does anyone know? I thought the point of texting was to help convey messages faster. Now I have to spend like twenty minutes looking up abbreviations to figure out what the stupid things even says. And what's worse, not only is it present in text messages, but it is now appearing in everyday conversation. When I hear "OMG, he is, like, so lame. But whatevs. I'll BRB," I want to rip my head off. That makes us sound so intelligent. You know, I think future employers are really going to appreciate that on you application. Yet, as much as I try, this one blog post isn't going to change anything. Instead, the most I can do is provide a list of common text lingo abbreviations and their true meanings to save time for those of us who hate decoding every message.
-LOL: I have nothing left to talk about but I don't want to stop talking so I'm going to keep saying this even though absolutely nothing is funny.
-OMG: Wow it is shocking how much I don't care about your stupid problems or gossip you're trying to tell me.
- BRB: The nice way of getting out a conversation without really getting out of it (A.K.A- I don't want to talk to you)
- IDK: I really do know but I don't feel inclined to tell you or explain it to you.
- LMAO: I'm trying to feed your ego by making you think you're really funny, but actually, you're not.
- TTYL: I'm trying to be polite by telling you I want to talk again soon. In reality, I will not talk to you again until I have to.
- GTG: I "have to go." Sorry, I guess I have to stop talking. Dang.
- L8R: I'm too lazy to spell out two extra letters.
- K: I'm angry with you and I don't want to talk to you. So I'm using short words to convey my anger. Hopefully, you'll get the hint and shut up.
Well, I GTG. TTYL! L8R! Seriously, this just needs to stop.
